On the Cheerful Side of Things

I see people around me who are genuinely cheerful. They don't say it with their mouths, their eyes tell that story. Cheerful people have a bright countenance. They hold themselves a little higher, they breathe sweeter air, and they lift up the people around them. I feel as if there's a definite line between me and cheerful...or maybe it's a wall. 

The cheerful side is where I want to be.I feel a draw toward it's inviting embrace, but...I have a weight that's too heavy. My heart feels too full of anger and frustration. Some days I feel downright bitter for the losses I've endured. I feel jealous of the people that aren't grateful for their blessings that I would gladly take off their hands. 

Then I hear a song that turns my world upside down and it comes in a moment of greatest need. My heart responds to music. I feel the Spirit of the God most powerfully when it speaks to me through melody. This particular song is the one God intended for me this week:         

 -Laura Story, "Blessings"

And, of course, there's my favorite hymn:

Father, cheer our souls tonight

Lift our burdens, make them light. 

Let thine all-pervading love 

Shine upon us from above.

Calm the surges of the soul;

Bid the dark waves backward roll. 

Let us all thy mercies feel

Thru the power thou dost reveal.

Bless our loved ones far away;

Grant them health and peace, we pray.

In their hearts let holy light

Beam to guide their steps aright.

Let implicit faith and trust

Help us know thy ways are just. 

May thine ever-tender love

    Lead our hearts to thee above.   

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I know the cheerful side is not an easy place to get to. I know it takes faith and trust in the Savior, and a lot of patience and prayer. It takes looking on the brighter side of things. For instance: "Yeah, my position at work is being downsized so I'll soon be unemployed, but now I get to spend an unexpected 3 weeks with my family in Utah!" or, "This month of trying failed, but now we get to try to make a baby for a whole 'nother month!" (No sarcasm here, I'm genuinely okay, even happy, about these 'setbacks'). And I get to constantly remind myself that a cheerful countenance doesn't happen overnight. I'm still greiving and am still allowed to have bad days. I just wake up the next morning with a prayer in my heart that today is not one of them and I can keep my chin up and practice getting to the cheerful side!

 

       

Little Blessings

So, I had just gotten home from visiting teaching [as women in our church, we visit eachother each month to share our faith and show support to one another = visiting teaching] and sent Evan off to play basketball like he does every wednesday. My puppies started getting excited at the back door and it made me nervous, so I went to lock it. To my surprise, five women were standing on my porch (at first it startled me, but I recognized them, so I recovered quickly). I let them in and they were some young women from the ward. They gave me a plate of cookies with a note:

They told me that they picked 8 women in the ward that exemplified each of the young women values: Faith, Divine Nature, Individual Worth, Knowledge, Choice and Accountability, Good Works, Integrity, and Virtue. I about cried! These young women are so inspiring to me. They live in a town where members of our church are grossly outnumbered (which, being from Utah, I'm not used to). Members of the community don't know a lot about our church and some of the things they know are incorrect. But, these youth go to school, serve/work in the community, and uphold the standards of the church and live the gospel of Jesus Christ. 

I'm definitely not writing this post to brag. This experience was a reminder to me that we can have a powerful influence on those around us when we're trying to live righteously. 

I'm only just starting to get back to my normal self after Kayden's death. It's been a long 7 months and I'm feeling better everyday. It would be easier to throw my hands up and wave the white flag; just be done trying and give up. But these girls gave me courage to keep going, to keep trying. I want the people around me to know that I believe in Jesus Christ. 

The following song reminds me that our Heavenly Father is in control; that His plan is in effect in every aspect of our lives:

 "What's mine is yours"- even my Scotlin and Kayden.   

"Hope Ya Know, I'm Having a Hard Time"...

...Sometimes as I pray to my Father in Heaven, some version of this phrase is blurted from my mouth. Not daily, but on the particularly rough days. He doesn't need me to tell Him, though. I believe that He knows my heart. He knows I'm struggling long before I tell Him myself. 

I also believe that these "hard times" are essential to my growth. For some reason I have to learn some of my hardest life lessons through loss. 

People tell me all the time that they couldn't go through what I've gone through. I promise you that isn't true. If you asked me three years ago, I would have told you, "I could never go through that" too. I am not special. My trial is not easier or harder than yours. I am not more faithful. I am not better or stronger. I'm just different. God asks different things from each of us because we learn and grow in different ways. We could not learn what we needed to learn if we all had the same experiences. 

I'm a total sucker for these "Mormon Messages" videos. They make me cry. Especially when the speaker has a message that's particularly relevant to my situation. But THIS video (it's short, like 3 1/2 minutes) not only made me cry, but motivated me to be a better disciple of my Savior Jesus Christ. 

I have resolved to trust my Savior and to look to Him to help me through my pain, through my sorrow, and through my grief. He understands me. I'm so grateful for Him and the sacrifice He made so that I can have that companionship here on Earth and throughout the eternities!

I can't believe how much He loves me

In honor on my 20,000th pageview, I thought I'd celebrate something I've learned the hard way over the past few years. However, I'm not as eloquent as THIS guy, so I'm just going to use his words. 

“Think of the purest, most all-consuming love you can
imagine. Now multiply that love by an infinite 

amount—that is the measure of God’s love for you. 

God does not look on the outward appearance. 

 I believe that He doesn’t care one bit if we live in

a castle or a cottage,

if we are handsome or homely,

if we are famous or forgotten.

Though we are incomplete, God loves us completely.

Though we are imperfect, He loves us perfectly.

Though we may feel lost and

without a compass, God’s love encompasses us 

completely.

He loves us because He is filled with an infinite

measure of holy, pure, and indescribable love.

We are important to God 

not because of our resumé but because

we are His children. 

He loves every one of us, even those who are flawed, rejected, awkward, sorrowful, or broken.God’s love is so great that He loves

even the proud, the selfish, the arrogant, and the wicked"

It's good to know I've got someone in my corner through

this life. The kind of someone who is always there, always

listening, always watching, and waiting for me to call on

him. And I know He'll answer me when I do. 

Much Love,

Whit